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"Well, Johnnie, you better pull yourself together," he says out loud to himself in the mirror. "Tomorrow's a big day. Who is this guy I'm fighting tomorrow anyway?"
"The name is Bond. James Bond." The voice behind him startles McCane, but instincts take over and he immediately drops to the floor as the mirror above him explodes under a hail of bullets. Using his feet he is able to close the door. Bond is somewhere in the hotel room behind him.
"I'm getting too old for this," he says to himself. "Our battle is tomorrow you dumb prick," he yells out. I already bought pay-per-view!" Another round of bullets rips through the thin door. "It's Star Trek: Generations!"
The gunfire stops abruptly. McClane looks around for a weapon but can find nothing but a toilet plunger. There are no windows. He's trapped.
"Oh hell." McClane jumps up and barrels through the door screaming and charging for his gun on the nightstand, fully expecting to run into a wall of bullets. Instead he runs into the wall. There's no one in the room. Quickly he grabs his gun and checks for bullets. It's loaded. But something's not right. Bond had him. Where did he go?
"Come on John, you're a bad ass. Why not be the ultimate bad ass?" John talks to himself as quickly pokes his head out of the door and checks the hallway. Nothing. "It's only a couple of rounds. You're a top seed. Piece of cake. Piece of cake, my ass!" John walks over and cautiously checks out the balcony. Nothing but air and a five story drop to the pool below. He walks back to the center of the room and looks around.
"Would you like to see my license to kill?" The voice comes from behind John. He spins around and fires but there's no one there. John feels his shoulder burn as a bullet rips through his arm.
"What the hell?" John begins shooting around the room indescriminately. For a brief moment he sees a flicker of light by the balcony. He's invisible? Suddenly, John charges towards the balcony. He feels the weight of an invisible body slam into his chest as they both go over the side of the building. Falling. Falling. Into the pool.
"I see you now!" John yells as he pulls Bond up from under the water and begins pummeling his face with his fists. Bond's invisibility cloak no longer works in the pool. He's now at a severe disadvantage as John has been pissed off and is missing his pay-per-view. Bond manages pull out a cyanide tipped pen, but John pries it from his grip before he can use it and shoves it into Bond's eye. "Can you see me now?"
Bond lives just long enough for McClane to force him to inhale two lungs full of water before succumbing to the cyanide.
I agree McClane wins this one...
"Yippee ki yay mother f***** womanizer" *headshot*
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Bad Ass + Gadgets = Bigger Bad Ass than John McClane
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